Correct me if I'm wrong but; I think I've been in denial this whole time. I may have acted out what I thought I was supposed to do, how I was supposed to react. All the while making believe that it'll all work out, so I've not been dealing with it for real. I now realized that you don't want me, and that hurts. I thought it was odd that I was able to put on the persona of a rock so easily. I was given the false hope that it would someday work out and the problem would go away. But it won't. The problem is left only with me. It took my grandmother dying for me to realize that. The false hope was just your letting me down easy, you don't want me.
I want someone who'll fight for me. Someone who'll pursue me. Someone who'll care for me in the ups and downs. For better or for worse. And I them as well.
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