3 books for two weeks

Here's the thing. I don't know what the thing is. I leave in less than 36 hours. I have not packed yet. I have 3 books to take with me. I have no idea when I'll see my bestie Jenny. I don't know what to wear. I don't know what shoes to take. It will be cold. I don't know how to get rid of pesty boys. I could tell him in Spanish again that I have a beau. But he apparently thinks that that only lasted a month, and started bugging me again. I'm never hungry anymore. And I'm sick again. I was already sick for 25 days. 25 days! now we're on stage two of this sickness, and it's been 4 days now. I just want to be well. I really don't want to be an imposition to anyone. I think I will be. I hope I live up to the hype that's been prepared before me. Blah blahblah. I just want to breath again. I need a job. I need something to get me a little capitol in order to be able to start my own work. My own path. Maybe I can re-try the custom made dress/clothes thing. That's an idea. An idea lacking confidence. Bah-humbug. I don't want to feel ordinary.